Dilemma….

I know your intention is right, what u did is for because you love me and for my sake. I know to worry is your nature, and you can’t worry more or worry less for me.

But while struggling trying to survive in the big city alone, I’ve tried myself hard, putting myself all in one, not allowing myself to break down but to continue walk, to continue climb, to win the battle, for the sake of your pride. No one can understand how I feel except those who are with me, joined me to win the battle together. I didn’t ask you to understand me, I didn’t ask you to accept whatever I’ve done, but all I ask is don’t pull me down.

I understand your love, your care, and your heart for me. But those love languages that u used doesn’t seems right for me. Not getting stronger in the society, instead fear is placed in my heart with those words and stories of discouragement.

And that’s how I’m in dilemma, cannot turn to left or right but stuck in between, whether to let you continue or to stop you, I know of your nature and understood your intention is out of love, but it doesn’t help me much and instead it push me down… And all I know and at least can do is let you continue, later I’ll break down to cry, and then I pick myself up and continue walk…. It had become a cycle….

but i still want to say thank you, thanks for everything. Maybe it appear that i don't appreciate for whatever you've done.. but in heart... i appreciate... that's why i chose to suffer in silence and cry to myself.....