Rant VII

It didn't come out of nowhere. No, I'm not going through PMS. It didn't come out of sudden. It's just you.....

I don't want to be rational. Nor i don't want to think in your shoe what or why are you doing this to me. I'm tired of being considerate and understanding to you, cause I know, you are taking me FOR GRANTED, knowing that I always put other people first in priority, then me, but it's NOT ALL the time.

I'm not asking for your favor, or you to do anything to me. No, I know, you don't owe me anything and i owe u nothing. I'm not counting or remembering the time when you didn't fulfil your promise or how do i define it.... all craps.

Yes, u didn't owe me anything, thus i cannot scold u or hold you with all the promises that u've made. Or i can say, it's not a promise, it's just air coming out from your mouth without the sound of the word uttered. I didn't ask for all this. I don't need you to shower me with your gifts. Or gifts that u claimed u've bought. I don't need you to 'promise' me you'll do this and that to me. No, u don't have to. I don't buy all that. Spending 5 minutes of quality of time with me is better than giving me limited edition of perfume. No, i don't buy that. Not that i'm rich. I earn my own pocket money mind you.

I took you each of your 'soundless air' that came out of your mouth seriously. Not that i'm a materialistic person. I'm just a naive girl, thinking how sweet you are, how nice you are as a friend, giving me all this offers and promises, or should i say, fake promise. or just crap. Maybe you think that i'm so immature or not rational now. Or maybe you're thinking that i'm in the peak of anger that hot air is coming out of my ear. No. I am not. I'm disappointed only, that's all. Cause you turn me down, not once, not twice but many many times.

Now you're being nice to me, cause u need my help. Oh well, I would rather lunch with cha sao bao, or movie with my girl friends, or loiter around with my fella friends. Too bad, cause i'm deeply disappointed by you.

And, I'm giving up on you!